Why Getting Lost Together is a Good Thing
Get Lost Together - It Can Be So Fun.
"Mama, I don't think this is the right way." It's something my kids have been saying since they first learned how to talk, mostly because I'm horrible with directions and navigation but also because we're always trying to do something new and don't know the way yet.
It used to bother me, and I would think, "Do they feel unsafe with me? Do they think I don't have their best interest in mind? Is something wrong with this 'let's do it together' mindset?"
"Will it scar them for life?"
But then I realized how many adventures have begun over the years with the words, "I think we're lost," and I never wondered if it was okay again.
It's more than okay; it's actually good - really good.
One example is our homeschool. I work 40 hours a week online, write, and homeschool while we travel, so that doesn't leave a lot of time for prep. As a result, I've resigned myself to learning with the kids rather than trying to learn everything before them and teach it to them. As it turns out, that strategy fits our kids well because they love to be the experts themselves. They love teaching me things, and I get so excited when the sparkle of wonder fills not just their eyes but mine too.
Recently I was delighted to learn that we aren't the only ones finding value in this type of education and parenting style. In fact, some of the homeschool veterans have seen the learn-together/big-sister model work well for their kids. (For more on that, check out Julie Bogart's blog post here or read one of her many books.)
Like me, I bet you're not normal or regular. I bet nothing about you is regular. Oh, you might pretend to be normal and regular much of the time, but when you're at home by yourself, dreaming about what kind of life you want to live with your family, I bet those dreams are far from normal.
I bet your dreams are extraordinary, out-there, untraditional, out-of-the-box.
Ours have been pretty out-of-the-box since our first baby was born in 2005. Those dreams led us to pack him up and move to a foreign country with barely enough money to make the trip. Then they led us back home and eventually to the full-time travel life we're living right now (and to even crazier things coming up very soon - more on that later).
We've had a lot of fun together over the years, and I'm convinced it's because we aren't afraid to go after big dreams and admit that we're figuring it out as we go along. Our kids know their parents get wild hairs and do really crazy things, and they know we're going to go after those things together.
Sometimes this means driving way too late at night to get to the next place. Sometimes it means losing sleep for weeks planning the next adventure or packing up everything we own again and doing something new. And sometimes it literally means driving around with a dead cell phone looking for the best way back home.
We know when we're lost, and we aren't afraid to get un-lost together.
So when conventional knowledge tells you that parents should have it all together, know exactly what they're doing and where they're going at all times, and never ever let anyone believe they don't have everything figured out, you know better.
You know that boring stuff is easy to figure out, but it's the fun stuff you're still figuring out as you go - and that's what you really want.
You know that life is way too short to only do the things you've already figured out.
You know what dream I'm talking about right now, don't you? It feels scary, and that's good. I have a gigantic dream or two waking me up at all times of the night right now, and I'm convinced it's an adrenaline rush that can't come from anything else.
So this weekend, get out there and get lost with your crew - whether it be on a trail or in the woods or even planning something big when you don't know how on earth you'll make it happen.
Let’s go after those family adventures you’ve been dreaming of together - even if you get lost along the way.
What's your favorite way to get lost with your family? Join the email group and shoot me a message - I'd love to hear about it.